Friday, January 26, 2007

I Had A Dream...

a most unsettling dream...

I was living at my parent's house, although they were not living there and I was apparently back at University. So somehow I meet some nice tall blond guy (note: I don't really like blond boys) and I think that in a way we kind of match, and he's kind of cute and he would probably be good for me. Plus he was kind of hot. So we make out for a while and it's great. Although he has these crazy boundaries and keeps saying things like: "I refuse to touch you above your knee". It was kind of funny but it's play and its good. Then he goes home.
Then this other guy, who kind of looks like my friend PH but isn't PH, [verging on short, brown hair, kinda cute] comes over and for some reason he and I start making out. (yeah.. haven't gotten any in a while.. can you tell?) So for some reason he is still there in the morning and says he'll walk me to the bus and take it with me to uni. While we are walking to the bus I start to have this feeling that this new guy isn't all that great, in fact he seems to be a little bit creepy. I start to feel like maybe it's going to be harder to get rid of him than I thought. This is not merely a one night make out session and it could be messy.
So we get on the bus and I'm sitting and he is standing by the back door. I'm starting to feel rather creeped out by this guy and I look back at him. He is looking at me and suddenly but slowly he pulls a gun out of his pocket, raises it to his head and blows his head off!
What is more disturbing about this is what was going through my head.... I saw him slowly doing this and I didn't stop him. I had time to shout or run at him or prevent it from happening but I didn't... I remember thinking that if he did this, I wouldn't have to worry about dealing with him anymore. I didn't stop him because I was morbidly fascinated by the ordeal and I was thinking that it could make my world simpler! I am evil! I let a guy kill himself and I didn't stop it!

I am so glad that dreams aren't real! Well in this case I sure am!

So what does that mean?

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